The GoR-geous Times©
Edition 2
Last Updated: 2/26/06 19:38 EST
Prepared by: Zargon and Kitty

Section I: Updates from councils
Section II: Guild rumblings
Section III: GoR-geous featurette
Section IV: Movie Quotes
Section V: Brain Teaser
Section VI: GoR-geous Guy and Gal
Section VII: GoR-geous 3 stars
Section VII: Credits

Section I:  Updates from councils
Every issue, there will be updates from each council with a discussion of what’s been going on and what’s going to happen in the near future.  Keep in the loop of things and read up!

Hunters:
Today, there were a total of 7 Cato kills, 3 armors and 4 cinches.  Armor was handed out to Meredin, Quildaran, Ardy, Endromeda and cinches to Meredin and  Quildaran.  If you’re anything like me, a cinch is a belt apparently, even though the thesaurus for Word says it’s a “sure bet”.
On Friday, GoR killed Zeus 3 times.  Kind of odd when you think about it since he’s a god and as avatars, we’re only part gods.  Oh well…  I guess that’s what you get when you have designers ripping off mythology for realms.  Zeusy popped 2 storms.  Congrats go out to Zanardi, Loreni, Zylara, Phyron, Lilcal and Perdu for making it a huge success. (which is almost inevitable since there’s 6 chars killing Zeus =p )
This past week, there was also a Guen run for 2 kills.  Karthil, Meredin, Zylara and Lilcal went and squashed Whoopi Goldberg and the rest of her nun actresses for making a lousy movie!  Way to go guys!  Now, if only there was a mob named Whoopi, then I’d probably run a little more =p.
On Tuesday, Lilardy and Meredin ran servant girl and Olanir from Nevermore.  They were suppose to have a pop, but they weren’t that lucky.  If you’re like me and have no idea who this mob is, I’m sure you can ask Lilardy and/or Meredin and fill you in on the details.
There was also a set and Percival run with Meredin, Karthil, Zylara and Lilcal bringing home the gold (at least 2 of 4 which are Canadian men! *GASP*  Canadian men can bringing home medals?  That’s preposterous!).  There was also a Justice run during the week.

RQC:
Congrats goes out to Romilda, who finished her quest, this past week.  I guess they’ll be my next victim *cough* I mean, guest to interview!

Mentors:
I have no idea what went on with the Mentors since the board was down when I tried checking.  Siporta, if you’re reading this, fix it! =p   Karthil posted something new about Azengar, so I assume they’re a relatively new pledge.  Hope you’re enjoying your pledge-ship, Azengar!

CoR + CoL + IGQC:
Well, we got whooped at the interguild PK.  The only KB we got was on a link dead cleric, which is kind of like the equivalent of incinerating a fly with a magnifying glass after taping it down.  Let’s try for a better showing so we can put up a better fight!
An anonymous leader has leaked some info to me that there are a bunch of new applicants as scouts for the Hunters council!  They’re waiting for more applications before they announce all the people.  Even after a little bribery, I couldn’t get anymore info.  I’m accepting donations to further bribe him (yes, I just gave away my source) in attempts to get these names!

Section II:  Guild rumblings
Each issue, we will fill you in on the latest happenings in the guild.  Not there for a funny occasion and you want to be filled in on the latest gossip?  This is the section for you!

Merf logged!  For those who are relatively  new, I believe he started the Hunters council (or at least have been the head of it for long enough to really have launched it).  He has always been our guild monkey ever since the day he said, “Running is easy.  Even a monkey can do it!”  To motivate the great ole and wise Merf, Lilcal had to guildtalk, “I've got a banana for you at Cato” and he came and killed!

Section III:  GoR-geous featurette
Each issue, there will be a new featurette so you can get to know a guildy a little more.  There will be a little favouritism towards new members since it would be helpful to get to know the newer ones first.  However, if you want to be in the next featurette, feel free to ask a fellow guildy to interview you and they can ship it off to me.

This week, instead of picking on a new member, I decided to pick on an older guildy who is in the contention for the top 3 stars.  It’s none other than.. Lilardy!  Special thanks goes out to Meredin for preparing this:  (Yes, that means “You wonder” means Meredin, not me, or worst yet, not the computer screen you’re talking to when you’re reading this to yourself)

You wonder 'So, Lilardy, how long have you been playing realms?'
Lilardy says 'about 5-6 years i think'

You wonder 'Most of that time with GoR?'
Lilardy nods solemnly.

You say 'Umm K, about how many characters do you think you have?  (av?)'
Lilardy says 'let me see'
Meredin offers his fingers and toes...
Lilardy says 'i don't really want to count..probably between 50-100'

You say, ‘What positions have you held in the guild?’  (Editor’s note:  I had to make up this question to make what Meredin sent me make sense.)
Lilardy says 'Head of mentors, CoR'
You mumble incoherently.
Lilardy says 'and probably guild 2nd, since i was nominated like 6 times'
Lilardy says 'i'm pretty sure it was the same person nominating me everytime though'
You wonder 'Why?!?'
Lilardy says 'because i don't want to clean donations'
You say 'Yeah, Gauther's good at that!'

You wonder 'What is your favorite item/room/mob/area in this game and why?'
Lilardy says 'favourite item is probably the mistletoe that the imms gave out for x-mas one year, it has a nice wear program'
Lilardy says 'favourite room is To Dream... in dunhill'
Lilardy says 'favourite mobs are madness, BR, legba and seth'
Lilardy says 'favourite area is Knights of the Round'

You exclaim 'Okay, lastly two multiple choice ones!'
You wonder 'Fight for Ranger.. OR... Level more thieves?'
Lilardy says 'fight for ranger i guess =)'

You wonder 'RQC or Mentors?'
You try to sing. Best you can manage is 'la la la'.
Lilardy says 'hi, mentors' (Editor’s note:  WOOT!!  She didn’t forget us with her riches *sob*  Lilardy’s getting first star FOR SHUURREE!)
You mumble incoherently.

Section IV:  Movie Quotes
Depending on the popularity of this section, we will see if this will appear in every issue.  Given its recent success in the Silverwolf forums, I think that this should be a hit.  Be sure to tune into the next issue of “The GoR-geous Times ©” for the answers!

In case you guys care at all, the following movie quotes are from movies that I really love.  Quite possibly, my top 5 fav movies all time!  Check out their answers in the next issue!

  1. “I'm fed up saving your @ss. I'm amazed you made it past puberty.”
  2. “It must be getting near tea-time, leastways in decent places where there *is* still tea-time.”
    “We're not *in* decent places.”
  3. “I don't pretend to be a man of the people. But I do try to be a man for the people”
  4. “There is Life in every breath...”
    “That is, Bushido.”  (editor’s note:  Bushido!  When this blocks or becomes blocked, it gets +x/+x until end of turn!  If you know what I just said, please mudmail me so we can play on apprentice)
  5. Person 1:  “You may be Jimbo, or Jumbo, or Jimbodini to those guys in there, but there are still two people who haven't forgotten where James Emmanuel Levenstein came from. We're awful proud of you son.”
    Person 2:  “Thanks, Dad.”
    Person 1:  “Don't forget your pen!s cream.”

Section V:  Brain Teaser
Each issue, there will be a brain teaser to make sure that you haven’t fried all of your brain cells from the computer monitor.  The answers will appear in the next issue, so make sure you tune in!  Without further ado, here’s this issue’s brain teaser:

As a reminder, here was last week’s question:
The aging owner of a multi-billion dollar company has decided time has come for one of his sons to inherit his fortune. He calls his two sons, who are both together in a neighbouring city, and tells them to get into their sports cars and race home to their father's place. The one whose car arrives LAST will inherit everything. After travelling at a snail's pace for days, the two sons have barely made it down one block. Weary and tired, they both pull into a gas station and lament about their father's edict. A wise man pumping gas at the station overhears them, and gives them a piece of advice. Upon hearing his advice, the two sons jump into the sports cars and race home at a break neck pace trying to get their father's.

What advice did the man pumping gas give to the two sons?

Answer to last week’s question:
Since the father said the CAR that arrives last, the two children could take the other’s car to get there first to receive the prize.  Personally, I would have shoved a melon in my exhaust, stuck the key in the ignition and snap it with a sledgehammer, pop both headlights with a kendo stick and put a porcupine on the driver’s seat.  But, that’s just me =)

This week’s brain teaser:
Pre-school children were asked the following question:         
"In which direction is the bus pictured below traveling?"                Look carefully at the picture.
The only possible answers are "left" and "right." 

bus

Section VI:  GoR-geous Guy and Gal
As a little bonus for reading through this issue, we’ve decided to pin up a little eye candy for you guys and gals (eye candy that doesn’t have that disclaimer of having to be over a certain age to enter, of course!).  Just try not to drool too much on your keyboard because I wouldn’t want to be responsible for electrocuting yourself!

This week’s theme, because of the much anticipated (well, maybe just for me.  CRAP, I gave a hint for the movie quotes!  If you look, you’re disqualified!) Lord of the Rings:  Battle for Middle Earth 2 game.  Anyways, without further ado, here they are:

Issue 3’s GoR-geous Gal :
Liv Tyler

It’s none other than Arwen!  Man, I wish I was her horsy in that first movie where she mounted and bounced up and down on to get away from those Nazgul riders looking to get some.

Issue 3’s GoR-geous Guy:
Honey Nut Cheerios Bee

In honor of Anabaena, aka the gal who is never satisfied with my GoR-geous Guy pic.  How can you blame me that I have better taste in women than men?  Pssshh..  Anyways, I bet you Ana-bee-na digs this dude’s stinger which to make this a non-XXX pic as promised, is conveniently hiding behind the box.  (Hey, I’m sure there was a bee on site at some point in the 3 LoTR movies…  CG probably just took him out)

Issue 3’s REAL GoR-geous Guy:
Okay, now that Anabaena got her hunk, for the rest of you gals, here’s this weeks REAL GoR-geous Guy:

Viggo Mortensen

None other, than Mr. Aragorn, the self proclaimed 86 year old man from the North.  (I think they only say that in the extended version!)  Anyways, I personally liked Legolas a lot more, but with all his prissy movies out lately, Mr. “I’ll decapitate the mouth of Sauron in the coolest sequence EVER” gets the nod. 

Section VII:  GoR-geous 3 stars
This section rewards our most active guildies by being heavily involved in guild-related matters.  This only represents my opinion and by no means represents the 3 most deserving individuals in our guild.  Also, as a little fun, I think I’d keep track of people stars.  3 points is awarded to the first star, 2 points awarded to the 2nd star and 1 point is awarded to the 3rd star.  Anyways, here they are:

3rd star
Once again, this honour goes out to Lilcal for leading so many runs.  What else can I say about this guy besides that without him, us recall-ridin’ Rangers would be mocked by the super strong and resilient Dunedine Rangers.

2nd star
This week’s second star goes out to...  Meredin!  He has been on multiple runs, submitted parts for this issue and gave me most of the updates this week!  Since it would be wrong to give myself kudos for preparing this week’s edition, I’ll give it to Meredin, who helped a ton! 

1st star
This week’s first star goes out to Lilardy!  She umm.  Was in the IGPK, umm..  was in a few runs and umm..  ugh..  (How else do I justify that she’s only here since she likes Mentors more then RQC…)  her name starts with ‘lil’ and is a pixie!  WoooT  Lilardy!  (and no, I’m not regulated by the figure skating committees, so I can be like the Russian judges in the Olympics 10 years back! =p )

Power Rankings:
Lilardy – 5 points
Lilcal – 5 points
Gauther – 3 points
Mossweaver – 2 points
Meredin – 2 points
Mirrelyn – 1 point

Section VII:  Credits
Thank you for reading through the third issue of The GoR-geous Times ©.  I hope you’re more informed and also enjoyed aspects of it.  I would also like to thank all contributors for this issue.  I can’t stress enough that if you wish to be a contributor for the next issue, please mudmail me about what you wish to contribute, and I’ll get back to you.  I want to grow these issues, but due to my diminishing time availability, this is only possible from your contributions.  So, for now, this is Kitty signing off.  See you soon!  (Editor’s note from Kitty:  I hope you don’t mind that I clawed out Zargon’s eyes for leaving me out from last week’s credits)